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Episode 1.3: Backfilling the Busy

Video available here.

Episode summary: 

In this week’s episode, Susanne and Missy talk about the unnecessary chores and extra volunteer work they’ve used as avoidance tactics, rather than tackling work they’re truly passionate about. They also talk about what’s coming up in the next couple months, and introduce a new, weekly segment: Look, Listen, Learn.

Topics we covered this week:

– Upcoming Guests [Approx. Timestamp: 0:52]

– Discussion About Backfilling the Busy [Approx. Timestamp: 3:27]

Key Points:

  • What is Backfilling the Busy? Well, we think we made up the term, but we bet most of us have done it.
  • It’s the idea of avoiding your passion projects, or working toward a major goal, and instead doing busywork chores, or over-committing to volunteer jobs, or getting sucked into social media.
  • Basically, Backfilling the Busy is filling your days, but not with intentional tasks.
  • The “shoulds” will get you: I have the time, so I should volunteer for X…
  • Just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you SHOULD
  • Sometimes when we don’t have an income anymore, we search for other ways to add value, and often, we undervalue our time
  • We often search for dopamine hits in timewasters, like scrolling social media or absorbing way too many hours of news
  • Do our personality types make a difference in how we approach backfilling?
  • A discussion about the difference between being responsible TO something vs responsible FOR something: a mind-blowing revelation that a therapist pointed out to Missy
  • Recognizing that by definition – a definition we made up – Backfilling the Busy is a luxury, and a privilege. We acknowledge that a lot of women are struggling and the last thing on their minds is whether they’re using their time wisely. 

– Other Resources That Came Up

People/Books/Etc. we mentioned (all of whom are dream guests, so… #goals):

– Look, Listen, Learn [Approx. Timestamp: 28:03]


  • Binged all of Bridgerton, a sexy period dramedy by Shonda Rhimes, on Netflix
  • Listening to Ask an Enneagram Coach with Steph Barron Hall
  • Learning how to be better at social media for our Mom, And… community.


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