Episode 30: Julie Lythcott-Haims
Julie’s new book, Your Turn: How to Be an Adult, was written with the 18-34 set in mind. It’s a book about adulting, and sure, young people need to learn a lot about being adults.
It turns out, however, that we, um, slightly older people also need some adulting help. As Julie said, “Adulting is simply the phase you’re in if you’re alive… So if you’re alive, and you’re no longer a child, you’re an adult. So [the book] applies to everybody.”
We love that. If you’re not a child, and you’re not dead, you’re an adult.
We had the best conversation with Julie, even if Susanne did threaten to hold her hostage. (Sort of… please don’t contact the authorities. Just listen to the episode.) This episode covers understanding identity in order to stop pleasing others, how to get yourself moving and stop hanging out in neutral, and caring for ourselves.
One of the things that’s on our minds lately is gratitude. It comes up in almost every discussion, with nearly every guest. Julie takes us through what that looks like for her, and has some great tips for incorporating gratitude in your life.
Oh, and more. Lots more. We’re not above begging you to listen, because Julie Lythcott-Haims is a national treasure. Above all, she wants to help people. It just doesn’t get much better than that.
More About Julie
Julie is a mom and… writer, speaker, and so much more.
Julie believes in humans and is deeply interested in what gets in our way. She is the New York Times bestselling author of the anti-helicopter parenting manifesto How to Raise an Adult which gave rise to a TED Talk that has more than 5 million views. Her second book is the critically-acclaimed and award-winning prose poetry memoir Real American, which illustrates her experience as a Black and biracial person in white spaces. A third book, Your Turn: How to Be an Adult, is out now.
Julie is a former corporate lawyer and Stanford dean, and she holds a BA from Stanford, a JD from Harvard, and an MFA in Writing from California College of the Arts. She serves on the board of Common Sense Media, and on the advisory board of LeanIn.Org, and she is a former board member at Foundation for a College Education, Global Citizen Year, The Writers Grotto, and Challenge Success. She volunteers with the hospital program No One Dies Alone.
She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her partner of over thirty years, their itinerant young adults, and her mother.
Things You Might Want to Look Up
- Mary Oliver, poet
- The Addiction Inoculation, by Jessica Lahey (you may have heard us mention this one a time or two)
- Real American by Julie Lythcott-Haims
Our Looks, Listens, and Learns
- Hamnet, by Maggie O’Farrell
- Art installation by Jazmin Quill
- This Is Us on NBC
- Rich Roll podcast
- Playing classical music in her home, in connection with… dog training
- The Guilty Feminist podcast
Connect with Julie:
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Musical NotesOur delightfully happy intro and outro theme music, “We Will Get Through This” is performed by Young Presidents, and used under license from Shutterstock.